A lot of brands cannot keep my attention, but We’re Not Really Strangers can. And it has managed to keep my attention for years now.

As notebook and printable brands continue to struggle to stand out, I’m fascinated by how We’re Not Really Strangers has managed to build such a recognizable brand.

If you spend any time doomscrolling on Instagram like I do, chances are you’ve come across one of their posts. Either a question that makes you stop scrolling, a statement that feels a little too personal, or something that makes you want to tag a friend and say, “Girl, we should talk about this.”

We’re Not Really Strangers sells card games, merchandise, and notebooks. What makes them interesting to me is that they don’t spend all their time telling people to buy their products. A lot of their content isn’t promotional at all.

Instead, they’re creating conversations, sharing relatable thoughts, and encouraging people to connect with each other.

That’s quite different from what we’re usually taught about social media marketing.

Social media gurus tell us to sell, promote, create engaging posts, and constantly push our products. But as the market gets more crowded, I’m starting to question whether that approach is enough for creative businesses.

We’re Not Really Strangers has built a brand where the conversations themselves create interest in the products.

As someone who has already tried and failed at running a notebook company, I find this particularly interesting. I’ve been thinking about what it takes to sell something as ordinary as a notebook in a market where there are already hundreds of options.

Looking at We’re Not Really Strangers has made me think differently about how creative products can be marketed.

Here are a few things I think creative people can learn from them.

1. Build a community around an idea, not just a product

This is probably the biggest lesson for me.

We’re Not Really Strangers didn’t start by trying to convince people that they needed another card game, notebook, or piece of merchandise. There are millions of those everywhere.

They started with an idea: meaningful human connection.

Before the company became recognizable, Koreen Odiney, the founder, was photographing strangers and asking them questions about their lives. Those conversations eventually inspired the brand.

Their Instagram account grew around that same idea. It shared questions and thoughts that encouraged people to reflect, respond, and connect.

In other words, the community wasn’t something they went looking for after launching their products. It was part of the idea from the beginning.

And I’m seeing more brands like KFC, Victoria’s Secret, Cécred, Red Bull, Fenty, Nike, and Peloton embrace community in different ways.

Making people feel like they’re part of something is a powerful way for creative brands to build loyalty and stay relevant.

The rule of thumb is to realize that people do not want to be sold to, but they sure as hell want to buy.

2. Create content people want to participate in

One thing I really like about We’re Not Really Strangers’ Instagram is that its content invites participation.

A question is posted, and people respond in the comments. Someone shares their experience. Another person relates to it. Someone tags a friend.

The audience isn’t just looking at the content. They’re adding to it.

That’s a very different experience from seeing a brand post a product photo with a caption that says, “Shop now.”

This is something I think more creative businesses should pay attention to.

If you sell notebooks, for example, you don’t have to post a picture of a notebook every day. You could ask people what they’re currently working towards, share prompts for journaling, or ask them what they wish they had written down five years ago.

You’re still talking about the world your product belongs to, but you’re giving people something to do beyond shopping.

I recently interviewed for a Marketing Executive position at a big cake house, and if I get that job, this is one of the directions I’d take their brand.

I’d want people to talk about celebrations, share their stories, and tell us what they’re celebrating. Not every post needs to be about the cakes we’re selling.

The lesson: Make your content something people can respond to, contribute to, and share. Don’t make them passive viewers all the time.

3. Market the experience, not just the product

A card game is a physical product. It comes in a box, has cards inside, and has a price.

But that’s not what makes We’re Not Really Strangers interesting.

People are buying the possibility of having a meaningful conversation. They’re buying an activity to do with a friend, a partner, or even themselves.

The product is simply the tool that helps create that experience.

And there are plenty of customer stories about how playing these cards has helped people have conversations they might otherwise have struggled to start.

I think this is where a lot of creative businesses miss an opportunity. They focus so much on showing people what they’re selling that they forget to show people why they might want it.

Think about a cake house.

They can post pictures of cakes, different flavors, and descriptions of the quality of their cakes. But they can also show someone celebrating a job offer, the arrival of their first child, buying their first car, or simply making it through a difficult year.

You’re not just showing people a cake. You’re showing them how they could celebrate with it.

The lesson: Don’t only show people what your product looks like. Show them where it fits into their lives.

4. Give your audience a consistent brand experience

We’re Not Really Strangers has a very recognizable identity.

They have both a visual and an emotional brand.

The visual identity includes the distinct red and white branding. The emotional identity comes through in the conversations, messaging, and the way they show up.

Most brands focus heavily on the visual and forget the emotional side.

But people don’t connect with colors and logos alone. They connect with what a brand represents and how it makes them feel.

When someone visits their Instagram page, receives a message, or comes across one of their products, the experience feels connected.

The brand has also taken its conversations beyond Instagram.

In 2020, it introduced a text messaging community where subscribers received messages and could respond directly. According to its Shorty Awards entry, the community grew from 14,000 subscribers to more than 1.2 million between March and December 2020. It also received more than seven million direct responses.

That’s interesting because they weren’t relying on one social media platform to keep the community connected.

They were creating another way to communicate with people.

The lesson: Your brand should feel like the same brand wherever people encounter it. And when you build a community on social media, think about how you can build a direct relationship with that audience too.

5. Collaborate with brands that make sense

Another interesting part of We’re Not Really Strangers’ marketing is its collaborations.

The brand has worked with companies such as Bumble, Coach, Valentino, and Diane von Furstenberg.

What I find interesting about this is that collaborations give a brand access to people who may not have discovered it otherwise.

But I don’t think the point is to collaborate with as many big names as possible.

The partnership needs to make sense.

For We’re Not Really Strangers, working with brands connected to relationships, fashion, or self-expression can introduce the product to an audience that already has some connection to its message.

This is something smaller creative businesses can learn from too.

You don’t need to collaborate with a huge company. You could work with a creator, a local business, an artist, or another small brand whose audience shares an interest in what you’re creating.

The lesson: Look for people and brands that share your audience or values. A good collaboration should feel like a natural connection, not a random attempt to get attention.

6. Let the product support the content, and let the content support the product

This is probably my favorite part of the whole approach.

We’re Not Really Strangers has created a brand where the content and the product make sense together.

The questions on Instagram reflect the kinds of conversations people can have with the card game. The content introduces people to the brand’s purpose, while the product gives them a way to experience that purpose offline.

It’s a natural connection.

And I think that’s why their marketing doesn’t always feel like advertising.

The content isn’t completely separate from what they’re selling. It’s connected to the product, but it doesn’t need to push the product in every single post.

Of course, a business still needs to tell people what it sells, make its products easy to find, and give customers a reason to purchase. Community and good content don’t replace those things.

But they can make the selling process feel much more natural.

The lesson: Your content and product shouldn’t feel like two unrelated things. Create a connection between what you talk about and what you sell.

7. Don’t force every platform to do the same thing

One thing I’ve been thinking about is how brands approach different social media platforms.

I personally enjoy We’re Not Really Strangers’ Instagram presence. It feels like a natural home for the kind of content they create: questions, conversations, short statements, and posts people want to share.

Their TikTok, on the other hand, is extremely underwhelming to me.

They seem to repost a lot of their Instagram content on TikTok, and I don’t think that’s making the most of the platform.

People use platforms differently. The content that makes someone stop and read a post on Instagram might not be what makes them watch a video on TikTok.

I think creative businesses need to understand what each platform is good for instead of simply copying and pasting the same content everywhere.

The lesson: Choose platforms based on your audience and the kind of content you can make well. You don’t have to be everywhere.

What this means for my notebook business idea

I started this article because I’ve been thinking about my failed notebook business, which I’d actually like to revive.

Trying to get people to buy my notebooks was a hustle because every piece of content I created was promotional. I was constantly trying to sell.

I’m sure a lot of people blocked my business, and I cringe when I think about it today.

There are already so many notebooks out there. Some are beautiful, some are affordable, and some are designed for very specific purposes.

So why would someone choose mine?

Looking at We’re Not Really Strangers has made me realize that I don’t necessarily have to compete by making the prettiest notebook or coming up with the most complicated design.

I need to think about the idea behind it.

What kind of people would I want to bring together? What would they use their notebooks for? What conversations could we start? What kind of content would make someone interested in the brand even before they buy anything?

Maybe there’s an opportunity to build a brand around creativity, reflection, ideas, and the everyday experience of trying to figure life out.

I don’t have all the answers yet. But that’s what makes studying brands like this interesting.

You start looking beyond the product and paying attention to the thinking behind the business.

And I think that’s one of the biggest lessons creative people can take from We’re Not Really Strangers:

You don’t have to spend all your time convincing people to buy your product. Give them something interesting to connect with first.

The product still matters. The business still needs to make money. But there’s a lot of room to build a brand that people want to be part of, not just one they occasionally shop from.